Here's Why We Celebrate Today

I shared an article on FB about Trump not taking away the LGBTQ's rights. In response a friend sent me this link:
http://johnpavlovitz.com/2016/11/09/heres-why-we-grieve-today/

This is too long to share on a FB post AND I don't want anyone to say I was shoving my opinion in their face so I am posting my response here on my blog. That way you can keep on scrolling and/or click away if you don't like it or are offended. Let me be clear, my intent is not to offend! I personally don't know why everyone seems to get so offended so easily but that seems to be the case. I'm just voicing my opinion in response to this article. I understand a lot of people are grieving. I'm now taking the opportunity to share why I am "celebrating". I wouldn't really even call it celebrating for me personally. I'd say I'm more hopeful but I'd say Republicans in general are more in a celebratory mood and they deserve to be.

So here you go, my response is in red:

http://johnpavlovitz.com/2016/11/09/heres-why-we-grieve-today/

Here’s Why We Grieve Today

Here’s Why We Celebrate Today

I don’t think you understand us right now.

I think you think this is about politics. 

I think you believe this is all just sour grapes; the crocodile tears of the losing locker room with the scoreboard going against us at the buzzer.

I don’t think you understand us right now.

I think you think this is about politics. 

I think you believe this is all just a victory dance; the fist pumps of the winning locker room with the scoreboard shining for us at the buzzer.

I can only tell you that you’re wrong. This is not about losing an election.This isn’t about not winning a contest. This is about two very different ways of seeing the world.

I can only tell you that you’re wrong. This is not about winning an election. This isn’t about not losing a contest. This is about two very different ways of seeing the world.

Hillary supporters believe in a diverse America; one where religion or skin color or sexual orientation or place of birth aren’t liabilities or deficiencies or moral defects. Her campaign was one of inclusion and connection and interdependency. It was about building bridges and breaking ceilings. It was about going high. 

Hillary’s America was also about giving perks to those who pay. It rewarded dreamers who did not follow rules (the laws of American immigration) and allowed illegal immigrants to cut line over those who did try to obey the law. It supported women’s rights but not viable infant’s rights. Her campaign was shown to be one of secret supporters, manipulation, actors/rioters paid to cause dissent and discord against the opposition.

Trump supporters believe in a very selective America; one that is largely white and straight and Christian, and the voting verified this. America is largely straight and Christian and the voting verified this. Most Americans have never made any assertion otherwise and are trying to make it clear that they are tired of being told gender is fluid, pronouns are fluid, Christianity is wrong, the Constitution needs to be changed, and we are deplorable and uneducated for feeling the way we do. Donald Trump has never made any assertions otherwise. He ran a campaign of fear and exclusion and isolation—and that’s the vision of the world those who voted for him have endorsed. Donald Trump’s campaign was of safety. A border with immigration laws that would be enforced. Background checks that would be thorough and vetted. That’s the vision of the America those who voted for him have endorsed.

They have aligned with the wall-builder and the professed p*ssy-grabber, and they have co-signed his body of work, regardless of the reasons they give for their vote:

Every horrible thing Donald Trump ever said about women or Muslims or people of color has now been validated.

Every profanity-laced press conference and every call to bully protestors and every ignorant diatribe has been endorsed.Every piece of anti-LGBTQ legislation Mike Pence has championed has been signed-off on.
This is not about one candidate over the other.
It’s not about one’s ideas over another’s.
It is not blue vs. red.
It’s not her emails vs. his bad language.
It’s not her dishonesty vs. his indecency.
It’s about religion being weaponized.
It’s about crassness and vulgarity and disregard for women.
It’s about a barricaded, militarized, bully nation.
It’s about an unapologetic, open-faced ugliness.

Half of our country has declared these things acceptable, noble,American. 

This is the disconnect and the source of our grief today. It isn’t a political defeat that we’re lamenting, it’s a defeat for Humanity.

We’re not angry that our candidate lost. We’re angry because our candidate’s losing means this country will be less safe, less kind, and less available to a huge segment of its population, and that’s just the truth.

Those who have always felt vulnerable are now left more so. Those whose voices have been silenced will be further quieted. Those who always felt marginalized will be pushed further to the periphery. Those who feared they were seen as inferior now have confirmation in actual percentages.

Those things have essentially been campaign promises of Donald Trump, and so many of our fellow citizens have said this is what they want too.  

Half of our country has voiced that we are ready to make a stand against illegal immigration, about common sense genetics, about maturity and agreeing to disagree. We feel safe again because we are not having to pay our taxes to support people who do not belong here. Not because of the color of their skin or because of their religion but because they are here illegally. We feel safe again because we have a leader who isn’t being paid secretly from special interest groups or from foreign governments who, by the way, throw gay people off buildings and don’t even allow women to drive. We feel safe again to properly call people Him and Her, He and She, instead of having to call people a Ze or Zit. We feel safe in knowing our 2^nd Amendment rights will not be stripped. We feel safe knowing refugees will be vetted more stringently instead of allowing people in who openly state they hate our country and our own FBI states they cannot properly do background checks on all of them. This is what Donald Trump promised in his campaign and this is what so many of our fellow citizens want too.

This has never been about politics.

This IS about politics.

This IS about one’s ideas over another’s, the ideas of where America is headed.

This is about who will be appointed to the Supreme Court.

This is about more big government versus a smaller government.

This is about more taxes or less.

This is about more Big Brother or less. More gun rules or more enforcing what is already on the books.

This IS about her emails, her dishonesty, her lack of prosecution and the American people tired of the double standard.

This IS about the American people tired of the lies, the deceit, the behind doors politicking going on that affects our lives and the money involved.

This is about our money being wasted. Any money the government uses is OUR money. We are tired of it being taken and used and wasted without a say in it. We are tired of it being given to people who should work for it themselves and/or for people who don’t deserve it. If you are in America illegally, you DO NOT DESERVE MY TAXPAYER MONEY!

This is about mandatory health care that is outrageously expensive and was a bunch of lies from the get go.

It’s about overt racism and hostility toward minorities.

And it is not only that these things have been ratified by our nation that grieve us; all this hatred, fear, racism, bigotry, and intolerance—it’s knowing that these things have been amen-ed by our neighbors, our families, our friends, those we work with and worship alongside. That is the most horrific thing of all. We now know how close this is.

It feels like living in enemy territory being here now, and there’s no way around that. We wake up today in a home we no longer recognize. We are grieving the loss of a place we used to love but no longer do. This may be America today but it is not the America we believe in or recognize or want.

This is not about a difference of political opinion, as that’s far too small to mourn over. It’s about a fundamental difference in how we view the worth of all people—not just those who look or talk or think or vote the way we do.

Grief always laments what might have been, the future we were robbed of, the tomorrow that we won’t get to see, and that is what we walk through today. As a nation we had an opportunity to affirm the beauty of our diversity this day, to choose ideas over sound bytes, to let everyone know they had a place at the table, to be the beacon of goodness and decency we imagine that we are—and we said no.

The Scriptures say that weeping endures for a night but joy comes in the morning. We can’t see that dawn coming any time soon.

And this is why we grieve.

 Mourning is a process, we understand because we’ve dealt with it. You’ll go through the stages and you’ll survive. The good news is that “the winners” are better winners than you are “losers”. Notice the difference 8 years has made. There was no rioting, no burning flags, no disrupting the peace and blocking traffic, no shouting obscenities at high school and college campuses when Obama was elected president. There was fear but maturity.

Do some research. The media has clouded you with a lot of negativity. Go back and look at Donald Trump before he was a candidate. You will find many flattering and uplifting pieces about him as a businessman, about his dealings with people of color, homosexuals, etc. He is firm but fair. No, he isn’t the best example of a gentleman but can you say that Bill Clinton was, either? Can you say that Hillary Clinton is the best example of honesty and integrity? You’ll still need to be the parent in your home and teach family values, no politician will ever take your place. Stop buying into the hysteria and propaganda. Fear sells. Sex sells. Scandal sells.

Do you want kindness, acceptance, neighborhoods that are friendly and welcoming? Stay where you are and keep doing what you are doing. If you weren’t in enemy territory before you won’t be in enemy territory now. Your neighborhood hasn’t changed unless you as community members do. Eight years ago our neighborhoods didn’t change overnight, either. We learned firsthand that our friends were still our friends if we treated them the same. You’ll see the same thing.

Stop the fear-mongering. Take it one day at a time and you’ll be surprised at how resilient we can be.

Big Brother IS helping in Louisiana

There has been a huge outcry because Big Brother, as in Uncle Sam, hasn't come to the aid of the flood victims in Louisiana recently. President Obama was vacationing, playing golf, and what not and waited until his vacation was over before he decided to comment and/or come see what the people needed.

Yes, I understand that President Bush was criticized for not doing more and not doing it faster when there was flooding during hurricane Katrina and that was when he called out FEMA within days. I'm not trying to make excuses for President Obama. Instead I'm hoping that Americans can learn an important lesson from this. Yes, some government assistance was expected and would have been nice but when in trouble there is a different Big Brother we should turn to first...Jesus Christ.

Remember America was founded on "In God We Trust"? Not in Uncle Sam. When there are troubled times God WILL help. How, you ask? He works through others. This flooding is the perfect example. Because the government was absent we were able to witness Americans stepping up and showing Christlike love and service for their fellow man.

The mainstream media might not spend a lot of air time reporting on those people willing to serve others but you CAN find numerous stories on social media. People taking their boats out to go and rescue homeowners from flooded homes, people bringing food and water to those stranded and hungry, a 9 year old boy giving up his birthday party and presents to deliver pizzas to those who have been stranded and need food, and on and on.

If you don't believe in God, fine, believe in the goodness of the American people. They weren't asking what religion you were. They didn't care what race you were. They didn't care about your job, your education, your social standing, etc. All they knew was that you needed help and they pitched in and got the job done. To me, that is the Lord working miracles through others. People acting as disciples of Christ as they listen to promptings to help and serve those in need.

Politicians and the media are really playing up scare tactics right now and getting people worked up about race, religion, politics, and highlighting differences. They seem to delight in causing friction. Take note, folks. When things get bad and we really need one another, that stuff really doesn't matter. Stop turning to the politicians and media for what's important. Start remembering the basic principles of what America was founded on..."In God We Trust". You'll be a lot happier. You'll appreciate your neighbors more. You'll be more independent.

America IS still great because of it's people...don't forget it!

Target's Double Standard

"Everyone deserves to feel like they belong. And you’ll always be accepted, respected and welcomed at Target. "

That sounds great, doesn't it? I like shopping at Target, I love feeling like I belong, I like being accepted, respected, and welcomed so Target sounds like the perfect store for me.

But here's a question, If I've already gone through background checks and been cleared to own a handgun, why aren't I allowed to carry in a Target store? Why doesn't Target respect me in that decision? Why don't they accept that I've had government clearance and automatically assume I'm not a "bad guy" wanting to cause trouble? Why can't I even carry it concealed and still be welcomed at Target? It makes me feel like I belong. It makes me feel safe and secure.

Now I realize it doesn't make others feel so safe and secure but if I'm conceal carrying why does Target even care? It's against the law for me to show it, let alone use it, so what's the big deal?

Because it makes others feel uncomfortable. It makes them feel like they don't belong. OK, Target is their own business and can set their own rules. I can comply or not shop there.

What is confusing to me, then, is Target's recent decision to allow ANY man in the women's restroom or fitting room. They say, "In our stores, we demonstrate our commitment to an inclusive experience in many ways. Most relevant for the conversations currently underway, we welcome transgender team members and guests to use the restroom or fitting room facility that corresponds with their gender identity."

At face value you look at that and say, "Lisa, you misunderstand. Target is saying they welcome TRANSGENDER team members to use the restroom or fitting room of their choice, not ANY person."

Unlike gun permits, there is no background check, no card carrying official declaration that someone is transgender. By being so inclusive Target has just allowed ANYONE access to the women's rooms. Anyone can go in as long as they say they identify with women. It's true, check out this video:
http://www.mediaite.com/online/florida-man-trolls-target-staffer-over-inclusive-bathroom-policy/

In case you don't watch the video, let me tell you about it. A man decides to speak to management at his local Target to see if he can use the women's room. He says he feels more comfortable doing that and is told by management that he can. The man also asks what he should do if any woman has a problem with that. The manager responds that "he will speak to them" should they have any problems with that.

Really?!? Target management will speak to me if I feel uncomfortable with an obvious man in the women's room. Will speaking to me make me feel better? Will speaking to me make me feel comfortable to have future men come in while I'm at Target?

If SPEAKING TO ME makes it all better, than why doesn't Target just SPEAK TO all the people who are concerned and uncomfortable with me carrying a gun? Why doesn't Target management explain that I've been screened, the federal government says I'm OK to carry a weapon so everyone else should be confident and secure with me carrying one, too? Let's love and be inclusive and think the best of everyone, I mean we are all at Target and just want to have a good time shopping!

What kind of stupid is that? OF COURSE not all shoppers are going to be loving and feel inclusive towards everyone just because they are in Nirvana Land of the local Target store! Just because the government has cleared me to carry a firearm does not make the majority of others trust me and my intentions. I get that! So why can't Target understand that I instinctively don't trust men in the women's restroom or fitting room?

Again, you may be saying, "Lisa, don't be judgmental. How dare you accuse transgenders of being pedophiles or rapists? Most of them are just people who need to pee and/or try on clothes." You might point me to this Facebook meme:

If you are saying that you totally miss the point, I'm not hating on transgender people! I truly believe that most of them do not want to draw attention to themselves. Most of them are like conceal carry weapon holders. They "conceal" their maleness as much as possible and if they do a good enough job or are far enough along in the process I'll never see their...uh...weapon. I could be in the stall right next to one and never know. Ignorance is bliss, I'd be none the wiser, so both of us would go about our day and back to shopping at Target happy and secure.

But, see, this goes back to my point of no screening. Anyone can go in now. Even "bad guys" who are perverts and pedophiles. There is nothing stopping them. They just have to say they feel more comfortable in there. Yeah, I'd bet you do! And if I complain because I feel uncomfortable I'm the one getting a talking to by management!

I don't know if this even makes sense to anyone else. To me I see it as a double standard, one that I have the opposite view of on both ends. I'm much more apt to feel secure around a legal gun carrier than a man who merely says he feels more comfortable in the women's room. I think Target has it backwards.

I'm not afraid. I'm not afraid of transgenders in the women's room. I'm not afraid because I'm not allowed to carry a firearm. I'm not even really afraid of being accosted in the women's room while shopping at Target. Just like with guns, if a bad guy wants to cause trouble he will do it no matter the law. If some pervert is intent on getting his kicks in the women's room he'll do it regardless of the store's policies. But I don't agree with Target's policy opening the door and inviting these perverts in in the name of inclusion.


So I'm back to something I mentioned earlier, Target is their own business and can set their own rules. I can comply or not shop there. Guess what? I'm no longer shopping at Target.

It doesn't matter what you think

What a way to shut down conversation, "It doesn't matter what you think or I don't care what you think." Sometimes the truth hurts, though. If you aren't willing to take the time and effort to vote, it really DOESN'T matter what you think! At least not to me.

Let me explain why I feel that way. First off, especially to women out there, do you even realize the pain, suffering, persecution, yada, yada, yada, that earlier women went through to fight to get you the opportunity to vote? This is one of the many things that we take for granted now a days yet we shouldn't. Do you know how many women throughout the world are STILL fighting for this opportunity? We're a bit ungrateful to shrug and say to ourselves, "Nah, I don't feel like going out today or The lines are too long and I don't want to wait."

Men, you aren't off the hook. Do you know how many men throughout the world would love to have the opportunity to vote? To let their voices be heard? Don't take our rights and privileges for granted, folks!

Second, everybody and their dog has plenty to say about politics in America today. "We should or shouldn't be doing that or That's so wrong or We need to do better about this." Whether or not I agree with you is irrelevant. You are welcome to your opinion just like I am welcome to mine. But if you aren't willing to stand up for what you believe in, who cares? You're just blowing hot air. If you want change then start being proactive and make your voice heard. One way to do that is by voting.

So what if your vote doesn't "win"? You at least tried. You stood up and were counted. You made a difference in that you showed others that you CARE.

If you don't care, OK then. You have the right to stay home, too. You have the right to whine and complain about the affairs of America, too, but I personally don't want to hear it. I feel like you are part of the problem. Whiners sitting around complaining and expecting others to take care of the problems for you. You want change? Get out and do a little something about it.

Yes, yesterday was voting day in Texas. You better believe I stood in line and waited my turn. Did I love the standing and waiting? Nope. Did I love being able to vote? You bet!

Do you feel guilty about not voting? Good! Do something about it next time. Then you can at least say you tried and I don't mind listening to your views. They matter (and count) if you vote. They are just hot air if you don't.

:)  That's my public service announcement for the day. Have a good one and God bless America!

SMH (Shaking My Head)

I haven't felt too well today (headache) so I've not been able to do very much. That has left me time to reflect and I guess when I don't feel good I reflect on more troublesome issues.

America is dealing with some troublesome times if you ask me. People all over the world are dealing with troublesome issues. From the beginning of time we've dealt with hunger, natural disasters, greed, pride, poverty, etc. and we always will. It's sad but true.

Technology has made things too easy for us. We don't have to farm for our own food. We don't have to get our hands dirty, we hire other people to do those things for us if we can. We don't even have to gather, store, and/or cook our own food! We don't have to make our own clothes, build our own houses, and on and on and on. We start thinking we are too good for those menial tasks and besides, we don't know how to do those things anyway because we don't HAVE to anymore. Ask kids where food comes from and they'll say "the store". Ask them where clothes come from, "the store", where toys come from "the store", etc. There are stores for any and everything!

So while we have idle hands we make up things for us to do. We now have to walk on a treadmill to get exercise because we have cars to take us wherever we go. We have to stop eating food because we have so much in front of us. We keep ourselves up too late because modern technology entertains us whenever and/or wherever we are. We throw away perfectly good things because we just have too much. We keep buying things we don't really need (and we probably don't even really want them a week later) just because we CAN.

Now of course this isn't everyone in America but I'd say the majority of us. Yes, even the "poor" among us has cell phones and more than just a day or two of clothes. Wouldn't you agree?

We've become "too smart" for our own good. We begin to put down others because they aren't as "smart" as us. We start feeling we are the most important thing in life and we forget that mankind needs to work together. Here in America we start arguing over politics and every little thing. For crying out loud, Americans are arguing over basic science now a days because we think we can change biology! No lie, mature adults can not understand the biology of gender! Do you realize how much time and money is wasted in politics because new technology and drugs can help people "change" their sex? Politicians have to define what anatomy constitutes males vs females. Come on folks, kids realize and learn this before kindergarten!

This "trans" nonsense is driving me crazy! Look, everyone I've talked to has personal body issues. We all have things at one time or another we wish we could change about our bodies. Hundreds of years ago the technology didn't exist so you dealt with it. Today we can change deformities, cure diseases and conditions that were lethal not long ago, and even prevent a lot of pain and sickness. But we've taken that good technology too far.

Don't like your nose? Have it changed. Don't like your boobs? Have them changed. Don't like your teeth? Have them changed. Don't like your Adam's apple? Have is shaved down. Heck, you can make yourself look like Barbie dolls with enough plastic surgery now a days and some people actually do!

Don't like your gender? Change it. Whoa! Right here we've gone too far. I'm sorry some people (and it's relatively few btw) are so self conscious or so disappointed or confused about their body that they are willing to disfigure themselves and take tons of hormones to change their complete look and build. I'm sorry they can't find peace and happiness with themselves. But just because they have this personal trial doesn't mean I have to accept their choices!

Why should I, with my own self consciousness about my figure or whatever, have to allow a man into the women's locker room because he "identifies" as a woman? He might feel like he should be "one of the girls" but hello, he isn't! He makes me feel uncomfortable having him in there and many other women feel the same way. Why should the rest of us have to feel even more uncomfortable because he doesn't want to change in front of guys? It's HIS personal trial, why are politicians making HIS problem mine? Why do they justify his insecurities by telling him it's OK to "identify" where he clearly shouldn't?

Now I know many people don't agree with me here and may think I'm heartless or uncaring or whatever. That's OK. I've had a transgendered person sit me down and talk for hours explaining what the process is like and how much happier "she" is now. I personally think it's selfish of "her" to divorce "her" wife (when she was a he), leave his daughter, and then try to find happiness in a sex change. Now "she" is a lesbian and was married to a woman. (If you identify as a female why are you not attracted to men like most other females are?) They had a daughter together but they've recently divorced. Hey you, I'm glad you're happy now but your happiness has come at a great cost to the others of your family. You've now "parented" two children who are raised in divorced homes and don't have the benefit of two parents...a dad and a mom. Not to mention your ex and your birth family.

This is sad to me. It's also sad that statistics show that she is much more likely to slip into unhappiness and take her own life. Not because of the other people around her but I think it's more because she is trying to live a life other than her biology. You can change the outside but you can't change your DNA. You can look like a woman and identify yourself as one but you never can be a woman!

Why is modern day America even arguing over this? Because we have too much time on our hands, too much "knowledge" and technology so that we think we can play God. We think we know everything and are more enlightened when really we're being foolish and playing with fire.

I'm sure the politicians love it btw. We fight over stupid stuff so we don't pay attention to the things that matter so much more.

It's sad.

Making lemonade (or lemon slushies)

When life hands you lemons you make lemonade, right? That's what I've been trying to do this month...make lemonade. I got stuck in the huge snow storm up in the East so I'll say it was more like lemon slushies :)  Get ready for lots of pictures!

We've been remodeling our 1920's farm house in Virginia. It's pretty slow going and my mom (who has lived there for a year and a half) has had to be out of the house for the past 4 months. The construction crew were supposed to be finished by Christmas so I was going to fly out there to help my mom move back in. Now, folks, we are only getting the kitchen and bathrooms remodeled, the painting and such is having to go room by room as the funds become available. I'm not going to bash the construction crew on this post because of course they weren't done and there were lots of things they did incorrectly. Instead, I'm going to show you some impressive before and afters.


 The bathrooms: Full bathrooms, yes, but you could literally sit on the toilet and wash your hands in the sink at the same time! The light switch was inside the shower but hey, this house was from the 1920's so be glad it had indoor bathrooms, right?!


We got rid of everything and instead of a bathtub we put in a shower with a linear drain.

One of the bedrooms was converted into a master bathroom. It is awesome but I don't have pictures to show you quite yet.









The original hardwood floors: Instead of radiator heating, we had those removed and put in central air. The floors were original but needed refinishing. They are gorgeous!

And my ultimate favorite...the kitchen!

No, we won't be leaving the walls the burnt orange color and we still have a few cabinets that need to be painted. I'll have to show you pictures of the mud room another time, too.


Now for reality...moving Mom back in. Here's what the basement looks like and those nice empty living and dining rooms!

All the boxes went in the basement while the furniture is piled into the front rooms. Things will be moved room by room as they are finished being painted. But look! Mom's bedroom was painted first (fresh cut grass) so we were able to get her set up. She is polishing up the original hardware and they are looking great.

The weather was nice when I first got there, though much colder than I was used to. I drove around the property on the ATV and took some pictures of the pond freezing over.

But then it started to snow. I had fun doing doughnuts in the pasture but it just kept snowing!

 And snowing! So much snow that all air travel was cancelled. I ended up staying an extra three days!

The neighbor boy was my partner in the slushy making business. He and I went and played in the snow. We tried sledding down the hill but the snow was too deep and powdery. We tried making a snowman but it wasn't good snow for that, either. Here's my Jabba the Hut impersonation. :)  What was really great fun was me rednecking his plastic sled behind the ATV with a long extension cord and pulling him in the tracks. My mom said she could hear me laughing all the way in the house. The poor kid was being plowed into the sides and completely covered in snow! We drove over and over to make bigger tracks and then we had some success. The main road had been plowed hours earlier and it still had plenty of snow and ice. That was the best way to sled, being dragged 15 miles an hour behind the ATV down the road!

Let me tell you, folks, it wasn't all fun and games. This is what Mom's car looked like. And the long driveway.

We kept getting stuck in the driveway so sometimes we parked on the street. Other times we kept trying to make paths with the ATV and we were pretty successful with that since Mom's car has 4 wheel drive. We also had to bring out the good old fashioned shovel and shovel walking spaces around the car. Can I just tell you that it's been YEARS since I've had to shovel snow?

And last but not least, I was able to drive my brother in law's Humvee around the mountain on his farm. That was a first!

So, you see, I'm still trying to choose happiness when things don't go as planned. The house still isn't finished but Mom is finally in. The snow was cold and thwarted my plans to get home to my family but I did have fun in it. And yesterday I was able to get home.

(And did I mention that there is no TV or internet at the house in Virginia right now? I missed that almost as much as I missed my hubby.)

Welcome 2016!

"Hello, it's me... Hello, can you hear me?..." I know it's been a long time but I am still here, being happy as best I can. (Can I just take a minute and tell you that someone needs to kindly take Adele aside and tell her to stop calling already? There's this thing called screening calls and if she has called a thousand times without an answer, it's not by accident. Move on, Adele. You're really being quite stalkerish.)

As for me and my house, we've been busy. Busy with the holidays, busy with life. I've spent some time reflecting as the end of the year came along. I'm not setting a bunch of new year resolutions. Sure, I could definitely stand to lose a few pounds, keep my house cleaner, yada yada yada, but in the long run my biggest goal is to choose happiness in whatever comes my way. Why make myself and those left at home miserable by me dieting and nagging them to help keep the house straightened up? Does that really matter in the long run? We'll all be happier if I get some chocolate and I have a place to leave crafts out that I am working on. Everyone else in my family is happier if they can have some comfort foods and a place to leave some of their hobbies out, too. If people visiting need room, we'll scoot stuff over and clean it off then. I'm not worried about trying to convince people I have a model home when I clearly do not. I'm not worried about trying to convince people that my figure is so important that I actually adhere to a strict diet and exercise to keep that killer body. As if I could ever pull that off! Ha Ha, no way! I'll bake my cake and eat it, too, as long as I stay healthy and happy. Moderation in all things, folks.

Since happiness is my focus, here is one thing I've been thinking about...the saying that money can't buy happiness. I'm not sure I agree with that and here is why. Not having enough money to buy the necessities makes life miserable for me. I'm always stressing about where the money will come to pay the bills, buy supplies, etc. That does not make me feel happy. It actually brings on fibromyalgia flares from all the stress. When I feel secure in our finances I have less stress which tends to equal less physical and emotional pain and therefore, I am much happier. 

Now let me say right here that my husband provides very well for our family and I don't really have to stress about the necessities. We have enough for our needs and most of the time for our wants, too. This year we paid for our daughter's wedding, we support two sons on missions, we are remodeling our house in VA, and we took a Christmas trip to Disneyworld. All of that money spent is buying some real happiness for me. Happy times, happy memories, a beautiful updated kitchen, etc. 

So yeah, money can buy a lot of happiness. But here is the point I think that saying is trying to make, money can't buy true joy. In my mind, happiness is the here and now. This moment in time that can not last forever. Reality will come back as you must go back to the grind of day to day life. The Disney vacation will come to its end. The wedding reception will be over and the newlyweds are off to start their own happily ever after. The big happy making moment is over so can you now still be joyful in the quiet time? The cleaning, laundry, back to your job/school/motherhood day to day life? 

God says that "men are that they may have joy." I think that is the true test, how to find happiness and fulfillment in between the big spending times. THAT is what I am focusing on. I think I'm doing a pretty good job, if I do say so myself.

Those newlyweds came home to spend Christmas. We didn't spend a lot of money. We didn't have to buy the happiness. We found joy in spending time together by talking, playing games, cooking and eating our favorite foods, and watching tv and movies from home. Sure, I spent some money on gifts but I didn't go crazy spending extra money I don't really have to buy things that no one really needs. Having things and stuff does not bring me happiness. Using what I have and loving those people in my life bring me more joy.

For example, my favorite memory was Christmas day when both my missionary boys were able to skype home at the same time. I had all my children virtually in the same room at the same time. It's been years since that has happened! That brought me the most happiness and joy, not the gifts under the tree. 

No, the gifts left clean up and decisions of where to put the new stuff. Do I need to get rid of older stuff to make space? How can I best get rid of the old stuff to make way for the new? Do I sell it, give it away, toss it in the trash, or what? 

Do you see my point that having things does not necessarily bring happiness? It can bring more work and worry. Storing it, caring for it, keeping it functional, etc. True joy comes from being content with my life and the people in it. I can't bring all the stuff with me. It's the memories and love that I can and will bring everywhere I go. THOSE are what I'm trying to focus on this year.

I think a lot of people in this country and this world could find joy and happiness if they'd stop worrying about stuff and the race to acquire it. If they focused more on using what they already have to make themselves and others around them happy. To find joy in the here and now even though it isn't the Disney fairy tale life. 

I now know from experience that Disney isn't all it's cracked up to be. Sure, it's joyful and happy making for a while but it is a fairy tale. It isn't real life. And that's a good thing. If it WERE real life it would be expensive, tiring, and too much of a good thing. It would get real old real fast. 

I'm thankful for where I am now, who I am now, and those I have in my life right now. They are making me joyful and happy and it's my choice to continue finding it in the little things around me.

Happy 2016 everyone! Thank you for being a positive influence in my life!

Love,

Lisa