Going back in time...here I was a young mom teaching special education as a first grade teacher while my husband went to graduate school. The love of our life, Jennifer, went to a babysitters nearby. (As a side note, did you know my first annual salary as a teacher was less than $17,000? No wonder there aren't many teachers who can survive on one paycheck!)
I honestly didn't know how I could love another child as much as I loved her. Is that bad to say? Parents, you probably know what I'm talking about. I hope so. So Dave and I decided it was time to extend our family. But this time I didn't get pregnant right away. This time I was already experiencing health issues that were vague. Irritable bowel syndrome. My first ever migraine. This was all AFTER giving birth to Jennifer. Let's also include my first trip to the ER with a fever of 105. That was our very first Father's Day as parents. Mastitis so bad I had IV therapy. They left the IV tube in my hand and I had to go to the ER everyday for 3 more days to get massive doses of antibiotics. I also had the "privilege" of every nurse and doctor in the ER wanting to come take a look. "I've never seen mastitis this bad in a human before! Only in a cow." Not quite the 15 minutes of fame I was looking for.
I also had laser surgery for ingrown toenails. First time for that. I also had a massive infection in a tooth that I had had a root canal on when I was 8 years old. It had abscessed when I was 16 and we thought whatever I had done then had taken care of it. Not so. I ended up losing the tooth and massive amounts of bone had been eaten away by infection. Thus I had to have a bone graft. They used ground up bone from cadavers to hopefully fool my body into regrowing bone there so I'd have something for them to adhere an implant to. After 6 months we realized that didn't take so I ended up with a bridge instead. I also had my first crown and tons of other orthodontic/oral surgeries. Good thing my husband's grandmother had a "Dollars for Scholars" account she would let her grand kids borrow from for college expenses. Apparently this qualified.
Anyway...I was getting pregnant and this time we were actually on decent insurance...mine through the school. But if I didn't get pregnant RIGHT NOW I was going to be in a pickle. You see, Dave was graduating and it was time for us to move on. Insurance for me as a school teacher would continue even after school was out in May but it would terminate in August when school resumed and I was no longer teaching. Uh oh. So we prayed. I was getting very nervous but wouldn't you know it, I got pregnant. But my due date was August 7th. Cutting it very close. And what if we moved away from Utah? We would no longer be in network so there goes insurance being affordable.
Teaching special ed while being pregnant wasn't too bad. Unless you count the one time my first grader head butted me while we were waiting for the school bus. I missed the next day because my body/uterus was not liking that. What was nice was that now I could get one ultrasound covered and we were able to learn the sex of this baby. Yay! Our first son. You know my debate on names but we decided to go with a familial name instead...David Alan. I didn't want to call him David or Dave, I wanted to call him Alan, but David Alan just seemed to flow better than Alan David.
Spring was rolling around, I was getting bigger and bigger, and more and more worried because now it was time for Dave to graduate. He HAD to get a good job with good insurance but what company would want to take me on? Talk about a preexisting condition! He had one GREAT lead, Intel, but it was in Oregon. I had never even considered living there but yet I cried as he flew out for his last interview. "It's OK, Lisa. I'll be fine and back in a few days." I had to admit that I wasn't crying because I was worried about his safety. I was crying because he HAD to get this job! I didn't want to deliver a baby and then turn around a couple weeks later and teach again. How's that for honesty?
He did get the job. He even looked at houses for us to live in while he was there. He found a new construction that was underway that we could actually afford. Strangers let him video tape their house in the development since their house was the same floor plan. But back then there was no Internet (at least not for me.) I told him to buy the thing sight unseen. My co teachers thought I was crazy. Are you kidding me? I was living in a BYU trailer, essentially a box car with walls and plumbing and electricity. How could I not love a NEW house? Especially one that I would get to pick colors on since it was still not finished??? I've always been a realist.
And even better, they would cover my preexisting condition. I think we paid maybe $10 for this baby. Ahhh! You want to hear something "realistic"? I was too pregnant to drive so I also got to fly to Oregon instead of driving with the truck loaded with our meager belongings. Play that pregnancy card for all it's worth, ladies! It helped that Dave's brother and his wife drove along with Dave and had everything unloaded before Jennifer and I got there. BUT...the house wasn't finished. It was unloaded into a top floor apartment about 45 minutes away. Yuck. You do what you gotta do, though, right?
Changing doctors with only a few months left in your pregnancy. Yuck. You do what you gotta do, though, right? I was pretty adamant that I didn't want another C-section if it were possible and this doctor would actually attempt a VBAC. I was young and healthy and he monitored me closely.
Can I just say that being pregnant while I was going to school was really tough. Being pregnant while I was teaching school and had a toddler was even more difficult. Especially there at the end when I was HUGE. In a new city, a 3rd floor apartment, no one I really knew, and a toddler to entertain during the day. Imagine our horror when I got put on bed rest. Uh oh. We had been attending the church area where our HOUSE was, not our apartment, so I didn't even know any of the local church ladies. Dave called and asked for help but we were told the names of ladies we could HIRE to watch Jennifer for us. That isn't usually the way it works in the Mormon church and you can imagine that paying two house payments just coming out of college was pretty tough. We ended up flying out Dave's mom to help. She was there 2 weeks but no baby came. My mom flew out next and that is when Alan finally came, right on his due date.
I'm not sure of how much detail I should go into about that VBAC. It was not pleasant. It wasn't working, either, so the doctor had to use a vacuum and help pull him out. He had a massive bruise on the top/back of his head for weeks and that caused some jaundice. Recovery for me was not as long lasting as a C-section but man, was it difficult from the trauma of giving birth. And nursing was no better. Men, the things you don't have to worry about! Women, some of you seem to have it pretty easy where this is considered. I did not.
And we moved when he was less than a week old. Into the new house. That wasn't quite done yet. But we were supposed to be out of the apartment by August 1st and they were doing us a favor in letting us extend a few weeks. The front door of the house didn't even have the deadbolt installed yet. My mom literally put a sock in it.
Can I just say here how much I love my mom? She was the biggest help. And so was Dave's mom. We never could have made it as comfortably without them. And now I had a dilemma. Being a homeowner had a lot more hidden expenses then we had planned on. Dave's "huge" salary compared to my teaching salary was not able to stretch as far as we thought. Wasn't it flattering when I called the nearby school and asked if they needed a tutor they could recommend to parents and they offered me a teaching position right there over the phone? I was certified, had experience, and school started in two weeks. Ha Ha! Flattering but so not gonna happen. So I ended up doing babysitting out of my home instead.
Let's end Part 1 here by showing you some pics of the adorable David "Alan".
No comments:
Post a Comment